Please explain the issue of making gifts to one's children during one's lifetime.

Answer

Regarding gifts for children during one's lifetime, the rulings are as follows:

1) There should be equality of gifts for all children.

2) If there is a valid reason, a child may be preferred over the others, e.g. the one child requires clothing while the others do not.

3) If a child is insolent to his parents or has become a drug addict, he may be excluded from gifts.

4) If a particular child is much more in the service of his parents while the others are on their own, this child may be preferred over the others.

5) Regarding hastening miraath (inheritance) distribution, this is not valid. The idea of hastening inheritance distribution during one's lifetime may not be used as a ruse for discriminating between sons and daughters. Allah Ta'ala has decreed Miraath for the period which follows death. It may therefore not be brought forward.

Allah Ta'ala often bestows upon a non- Muslim, by virtue of him or her having adopted certain praiseworthy Islamic qualities, the greatest gift - Hidaayat (guidance) into Islam. Hence, it is quite often ascertainable that a convert to Islam had already possessed certain praiseworthy Islamic traits even during his or her days of Jahiliyyah (ignorance) prior to the conversion.

In this respect, the greatest of converts to Islam, the Sahabah (radhiyallahu anhum), had already possessed numerous praiseworthy Islamic traits, even prior to their conversion.

In a narration recorded by Ibn Katheer in his al- Bidayah, al-Bayhaqi in his az-Zuhd and al- Muttaqi in his Kanz, the Sahabah, Alqamah ibn Al -Haarith (radhiyallahu anhu), after having accepted the essential beliefs and practices of Islam, mentions the following five traits that his people had already possessed prior to their entry into Islam:

"(There are) five traits we adopted in (our days of) Jahiliyyah, which we are (still) upon till now, unless you prohibit us, O Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wasallam)….:

1) Gratefulness during times of ease (i.e. displaying appreciation to Allah and to all those concerned).

2) Patience during calamities (i.e. being completely calm and contented in any difficult situation).

3) Displaying honesty (and integrity) in the arenas of interactions (and confrontations with people).

4) Being satisfied with the bitterness of fate.

5) Avoiding rejoicing over calamities that befall one's enemies."

On hearing of these qualities Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) proclaimed:

"People of understanding! People of cultured manners! It is almost as if they are (similar to) Prophets in terms of traits - how noble they (i.e. these traits) are!"

He (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) then said:

"I advise you with five (more) qualities by which Allah will perfect for you, (your) good qualities."

1) Do not gather what you will not eat (i.e. do not hoard).

2) Do not build that in which you will not live.

3) Do not compete for that which you will (have to) leave behind tomorrow (i.e. do not compete for the objects and aspirations of this short-lived term of life).

4) Fear that Allah in front of Whom you shall be gathered and to Whom you shall have to go.

5) Desire earnestly for that which you are heading towards, and in which you will dwell forever (i.e. the Aakhirah)."